Like Everyone Around Me

I ask my mom for money she don´t really have to buy me clothes and shoes to impress everyone around me. I spend an hour each day painting my face and smoothing my hair to look just like everyone around me. My Bible rests on my nightstand, no time to read or pray but I have time to watch the shows and bop to the music of everyone around me. I found a website with pictures of everything I want and another one from a ministry with pictures of children who have no shoes. They wear tattered clothes and rejoice for a bowl of rice, but their smiles glowed with a beauty unlike everyone around me. It struck me. I don´t rejoice; I want. I´m anxious, disconten, jealous and insecure. I suddenly remembered, that I was one of them. I changed myself  to be like everyone around me. I changed my happiness and joy to be like everyone around me. I tried to be like everyone around me. I tried to be someone who was not me. I fell to my knees and cried in pain. I let the Holy Spirit speak to me, "Be like me; Be like me," And suddenly I didn´t want to be like everyone around me. I want to be like Him. 

 But we all, with unveiled face, beholding as in a mirror the glory of the Lord, are being transformed into the same image from glory to glory, just as by the Spirit of the Lord.                                                                                                                                                                    2 Corinthians 3:18

God bless you!

I Made a Mistake, And Now What?

  It´s been a month since I left Refuge Ranch. It´s been a month since I thought I knew better than God. It's been a month since I made the biggest mistake of my life. I decided to do what I wanted, leaving God out of my life. Being young can be difficult and sometimes confusing. Everyone is different, every head is a different world. But no matter where we go or what we do, God will always be there with and for us. I'm young, and like all of my age, we all think that we know everything, and sometimes we think that we know better than God. You may be thinking. What do you mean? I'll tell you what I mean. I´m just seventeen years old, and I made the mistake of thinking that I knew better than God and better than my parents! Here's the story. I mean, part of my story that has made me grow in many ways. A few months ago, I got tired of waiting and waiting to leave my house and make my life. I know that sounds silly, but that's how I started to make mistakes over and over again. instead of waiting and trusting God I decided to go, and do what I wanted. Instead of knowing more about God, I knew more about novels. Instead of honoring my parents, I dishonor them. Instead of giving a good example to my brothers and sisters, I did the opposite. Now, I feel alone, I lost everything I had for trusting in myself and for thinking that I could control my life. Now, I´m with my biological mother, instead of being with the person that I consider my mother. I made a mistake, and now what? I´ll tell you what!. ¨ Today I will get up. I will lift up my eyes on the horizon. Attentively contemplate my past. and learn from each of my falls ¨ I´ve decided. ¨No more poison coming out of my mouth.
No more doubts about God. No more wanting to do what I want.¨ And all because. I left many broken hearts back home, and a mother who prays like this. 
     ¨Oh Lord, please make her come. No matter how difficult it may be, you said that nothing is impossible when you believe. Oh Lord, please take care of her, wherever she is. This life can be hard. I have no doubt that you can touch her heart and make her come.´¨ MAKE HER COME!
It is true, I made a huge mistake, and that´s why I´m writing this little story so that you don´t do exactly what I did. Remember, you don´t know what you have, until you lose it! So, I know you´ve made a mistake, but NOW WHAT?  
 
Who forgives all your iniquities,
Who heals all your diseases,
                              Psalms 103:3


                                                                                                                          By: *Diana Zaragoza*